10 Things to Do For International Women's Day

I read Virginia Woolf's 'A Room of One's Own' when I was 17, and it changed the way I live my life. It has given me the lifelong habit of taking my work and my creativity seriously, and always, always, creating time and space for my self and my work in the midst of my busy, demanding life as a woman/wife/mother.

I just read (well, actually, skimmed) this Washington Post article, International Women's Day - 10 Ways to Celebrate. First of all, it's in the Lifestyle section. Because, I guess, being a woman is a lifestyle. Then, it includes ideas like sending flowers, eating cupcakes, and wearing red lipstick, for various political reasons and causes. Well, OK, that's fine, I actually like doing all of those things too (although I've switched to mellow berry tones and corals now that I'm over forty.) But anyway, this article inspired me to create my own list of 10 things to do in honour of International Women's Day, and here it is! Enjoy.

• Say Thanks.  Take the time today to reach out to a woman who has helped make you who you are. Did someone mentor you in your profession? Encourage you in school? Did your Mom raise you right? Is there a living writer, blogger, artist, or activist who has changed your life as a woman? Let them know. Call, write an email, or send a note.
• Say No Thanks. Is there someone in your life, or your world, who needs to know that their sexist or misogynistic behaviour is unacceptable? Take the time to let them know. Maybe you need to write to a politician or journalist. Maybe you need to have a gentle word with a coworker. Today, instead of just rolling your eyes, write that letter.
• Support a Cause. There are so many great organizations working to uplift women worldwide. Tap in today and see what you can do to help. Make a donation. Volunteer locally. Participate in a letter writing campaign. I could suggest causes, but you need to act on what is closest to your heart.
• Speak Out Against Sexism. I mean this literally. Please don't let that comment go by unacknowledged because you don't want to rock the boat. There are so many little opportunities every day to be honest and clear about how the sexist trivia of life affects you. It's OK to draw the line. Maybe you need to tell your partner that you won't watch that TV show anymore because there is so much gratuitous violence against women in it. Maybe you need to remind your friend that it hurts you when she constantly denigrates her own body. Start small, but speak your truth. It helps all of us when you do.
• Journal or blog about being a woman. What is your experience? What is this world and this society like for you as a woman? What do you love, what do you hate? How do you define slippery words like feminism and femininity?
• Read other women's work. You could delve into feminist history with Simone de Beauvoir or Virginia Woolf, explore modern classics with Andrea Dworkin or bell hooks, or explore the vibrant world of contemporary feminist writers and bloggers like Meghan Murphy.
• Change Your Own Mind. None of us is free of ingrained sexism. Can you do some searching self-inquiry and commit to a small change?
• Organize. Have you not found a local cause or organization, or an internet campaign that addresses a certain women's issue that's important to you? Then you've found your opportunity. You can start small, with a blog or facebook page to raise awareness, or dream big and start a foundation or non-profit society. The important thing is that you start, and today is a great day to begin!
• Be a Mentor. Young women need help navigating this society successfully. You have wisdom to share. Can you reach out to a younger colleague, a relative, a student, or a friend's daughter?  If you don't have a special personal connection with a mentee, maybe you have a skill or set of ideas you can present or share at a local high school or youth group. Use your imagination and intuition to find ways to connect and help.
• Stop Hurting Yourself. It pains me to say it, but as women in this culture, we are taught to shame and denigrate ourselves. We are taught to dislike our bodies, distrust our instincts, and to connect with one another in shared self-denigration. You know what I'm talking about. JUST. STOP.

So yeah. Happy International Women's Day. We've got our work cut out for us, so it's a good thing we are so beautiful, strong, courageous, and resilient.

10 ways to thoroughly enjoy your weekend

Being self-employed, for years I didn't really respect the boundaries between the work week and the weekend. Work found its way into all the nooks and crannies of time in my week; evenings and late nights, during meals, and, of course, on weekends. A year or so ago I felt myself approaching burnout, and one of the first things I did was to reclaim my weekends. Yes, I had to retrain myself (and my clients!) and I felt guilty, and it was challenging. But sooooo worthwhile. Now, I look forward to my weekends as times of pure relaxation, recreation, and fun. I protect them, even when I have lots of work and tight deadlines. It's essential to my well being.

And... the big surprise? I am much more productive, better at meeting deadlines, and more creative in my work than I was when I ignored weekends and worked all hours. You should try it.

If you're like I was, nearing burnout, you may have forgotten some of the simple joys of free time, and the art of weekend activities. To get your imagination started, here are some simple things I love to do on the winter weekends:

• Stay in bed in the morning, with coffee, my pug, fluffy pillows, a scented candle burning, my laptop (for fun only of course - Pinterest for example!), my journal, and piles of magazines.
• Go for a long, leisurely walk, bringing my camera and leaving my heart rate monitor at home.
• Thrift store shopping. Lately I've been scooping up old pressed glass to display candles, floral china plates and saucers for holding everything, and vintage sewing notions for crafty fun.
• Tackle household projects. This month, it's organizing, and giving my study a makeover.
• Enjoy leisurely, non-work-or-household-related conversations with my sweetie.
• Try new yoga practices from magazines or podcasts.
• Spend an afternoon in the kitchen. I putter, make complex meals, or prepare and plan the food for the week.
• Putter in my house and make little area of beauty and order - clean out a drawer, make a gorgeous tablescape, or arrange a bowl of flowers.
• I'm one of those people who loves to plan*, so it is actually fun for me to plan my week in my planner, or work in my Life Binder (more on that later!) Of course, this happens in a cozy chair in front of the fire, with a cup of Sumatran coffee or Coconut Chai.
• The best thing about our crazy new giant TV is using Apple TV to catch up on TED Talks, watch last year's episodes of Downton Abbey, or, as I am today, watching hours of talks with the Dalai Lama.

 Here's what this weekend's pleasure is looking like, enjoying fresh flowers in my kitchen as I prep the week's meals, welcoming His Holiness into my livingroom, working on my recipe binder, and enjoying some coffee (organic sumatran with soy milk and agave nectar, yum), planning and journaling in front of the fire:

Would you like to share your weekend pleasures? I'd love to know what you're up to.






*My dear friend K, a very spontaneous lady, sometimes reminds me of the time she said to me "We should do something spontaneous!' and I replied "Oooh! Fun! Let's plan for it!"

Happy Heart Day

I photographed this gorgeous life-size ceramic sculpture in the indoor tropical garden at the Art Centre, Burlington, Ontario, my sweetie's hometown. This peaceful, flowery, warm place was a refuge for us last Fall.

'When you begin to touch your heart or let your heart be touched, you begin to discover that it's bottomless, that it doesn't have any resolution, that this heart is huge, vast and limitless. You begin to discover how much warmth and gentleness is there, as well as how much space. Your world seems less solid, more roomy and spacious. The burden lightens.'

   ~Pema Chodron, in Start Where You Are

May your heart be touched today.

I want to let you know that my heart was touched deeply by all the responses I got to my last post - in the comments, and via email and Facebook. What a beautiful, wise woman you are, dear reader. It amazes me what you have survived, how strong and loving your heart is, what courage you have, what creativity and gentleness. Thanks for being here, and I'm so happy if I can bring a little extra beauty or inspiration to your life.

Today, whether you are with a partner, a friend, or just with yourself, and whether you are happy or sad to see this day, I hope you can love yourself deeply and give yourself exactly what your heart needs.

Hi! I have a question for you.

 

Hi! Have I told you how much I appreciate you? I'm really grateful for the small but loyal crew of creative women who follow The Artful Life. Yes I mean YOU.  It wouldn't be much fun creating this space without you...

I know I've been neglecting you lately, and I'm sorry. I want to spend more time here, because it's so much fun for me, and truly feeds my creativity - and I love hanging out with you guys.

I've been going through some changes.  I went on a big journey last fall; I had the honour of accompanying my dear father-in-law as he journeyed towards, and into, his death. This journey woke me up. I am so grateful for that.

And now I am filled with this pure, relentless desire to cut the bull!#$%t from my life. To stop making excuses for not living my very best life. To take radically great care of myself. To fearlessly tackle the crap that I just know is holding me back. I mean, I want to seize this gorgeous day and squeeze all the pure juice out of it, then use the zest too, and the pith and the pulp and then compost the crap out of whatever is left over. Do you know what I mean? NO MORE EXCUSES. Yes, dear self, this might be hard. Stop whining. Be happy. What other choice do you have?

That's where I am right now. And things are shifting and moving in surprisingly beautiful ways. I'm shining a bright light on all of it, and cleaning it out; everything from my spice drawer to my hidden vices are getting cleared out.

I think this little blog will shift and move and grow and brighten too, just not sure how yet, and i
I want your input, I really do. This blog is for me, and it's also for you. It's a labour of love. I want it to please you.

So talk to me. What do you love about being here? What would you like to see more of? Regular features you'd like to see? Stuff I can make for you? What do you come here for? Tell me your ideas. Let's talk.

OH! and I will give you some incentive, too.
Next weekend I'll randomly choose one of you from the comments on this post, and send you something nice via snail mail. I don't know what yet. It will be a good surprise. Like some vintage ephemera or a porcelain ring, or something like that. So weigh in and be surprised. xo

spring is coming.... really....

My friend Katarina is a talented painter, and, it turns out, also a great teacher! I signed up for a Thursday evening acrylic painting class with her, and indulged in a whole delicious evening of playing in paint last night. Behold the results, above. Yes, I am learning and having fun!!

This is all part of my year of Transformation; getting out of the house, out of my comfort zone, into my creativity and joy.  It's working!

What did you do this week to indulge your creativity?

Oh, and go check out Katarina's 'drawing a day' blog, The Slow Studio, here. You'll love it!

making a cozy sewing machine cover with song birds

Last week I found this photo over at Geninne's Art Blog (I love her); it's an adorable cozy she made for her sewing machine. I immediately wanted to make my own, inspired by this one!

One of my projects for the winter is to get all my for-fun-not-for-work art and craft supplies out of the ceramics studio, where I really don't use them, and into my new home office, neatly organized, and ready for winter evening craft fun.

A strategy I use to get myself moving on projects is to start with the fun.

It might seem more sensible to start working on my home office by cleaning, decluttering, and painting - yet, if I start there, it's likely that I'll wait a lot longer to start, because I don't actually want to spend a rainy winter weekend cleaning. I'd rather have fun. So what works for me is to start with a fun project like making a sewing machine cozy.  Then I'll likely get really excited about cleaning and decluttering, to make a home for for the new fun sewing machine cozy. Good strategy, right? It's like starting with dessert.

So I spent yesterday evening and this morning making a Gennine-inspired cozy, with my own flowery vintage twist.  I got out my stash of vintage fabrics and found some really cute florals in happy colours, as well as a hand embroidered table runner with sweet blue songbirds. I made a quick-n-dirty paper pattern with scotch tape and printer paper and got busy. Here are the results:

 What do you think? I love it, and I'm so inspired now to do some cleaning and painting to create a worthy home for this new loveliness. Is there a fun project you can do this week to get yourself inspired?

being present: witnessing death, savoring life.

We received news today of another death in our extended family. This unexpected passing leaves three teen children without their father.

I have to wonder why we work so hard in our society to shut our eyes to the ordinary, daily reality of death. Our entertainment consists of  weird gory/glamorous fetishization of death (CSI et al,) and yet we turn our backs to the mundane, far from glamourous, but very real face death.

I believe this denial impacts not only our abilty to deal in healthy ways with death and grieving when they occur, but also our capacity to fully enjoy life and be present in the precious moments we do have with our loved ones.

I am sorry to bring a somber moment to your Saturday morning. Yet I believe if we can be truly present in and aware of all the moments of life, we will live more fully, more joyously, more artfully. We will be able to be more present for those who are in grief, and those who are dying. We will savor our moments of ordinary beauty all the more.

What can you do today, right now, to savor your precious aliveness? What can you do today, right now, to savor your time with those you love? Go do it!

friday i'm in love - alternative stress management

Hello Beautiful,

I hope that every week I can fall a little bit more in love with the world.

Seriously.

This mysterious dance we do on the earth, in human skin, it's like a love affair.

Deluded, yet exquisitely, perfectly real. Gorgeous, all encompassing, so beautiful. Perfect, ecstatic, unbelievably unfair and painful.

Sacred, mundane.
Prepare for transfiguration, miracles, euphoria, ecstasy, boredom, and dirty dishes. Then more ecstasy. Don't forget the mystery.

Love. I don't reserve it only for my most intimate beloveds: child, partner, buddha, pug, self, island. I bestow it widely, on many things and people and experiences - I love so much. Don't you?

SO Fridays on The Artful Life are devoted to being in love. And talking about it. This feature is all about whatever I fell in love with this week, on the interwebs or otherwise. And whatever I think you might fall in love with too. Little loves and big loves. So here we go:

This week, I'm in love with a few special alternative stress management tools.  And by "alternative," I mean, an alternative to a glass or three of excellent central coast cabernet.

Because this is what I'm personally working on for my month of moderation.

Now don't get me wrong - I'm not powerless, and my life is perfectly manageable, thank you. But I confess, over the last year or so (did I mention what a year 2011 was?) I'd become a little too comfortable reaching for the red as my first line of defense against a stressful day.

I don't intend to give up my cabernet. I just want it to resume its proper place in my life; as an occasional pleasure, and enhancement to celebration, an accent to a great meal, a special treat shared with friends. In order to help this adjustment along, I've given up the stuff entirely for the month of January. What a great chance to encourage a healthy body, and find new (or renew tried and true) ways of managing stress!

I've had some work to do re-adjusting my habits. I needed to retrieve my somewhat dusty toolbox of stress relief stuff, and get busy. I've even added some new tools to that toolbox. And right about now, I am feeling SO good... and I really am in love with these beautiful alternatives:

hot baths

This gorgeous print by artist joojoo is available here on Etsy! I'm getting one for sure.

the elliptical trainer

I know, I know. The very words 'elliptical trainer' used to fill me with a kind of nauseous dread. But that was before. Now, this is my new best friend. In case you didn't know, cardio is an awesome mood elevator.

meditation

You've heard me say it before, and you'll here me say it again. Simple mindfulness meditation is really, really powerful.

polyvore

It's retail therapy without the bills. I know you have probably been on here for months - years! But I just tried it for the first time and it's so fun! Above is my first set.

Ok, now you are prepared to go forth and have an awesomely de-stressful weekend. Happy Friday, and go have a glass of cabernet for me!

how to live fearlessly: tiny fears, tiny steps, tiny victories, tiny miracles.

Practicing fearlessness isn't just about the big stuff. It's about the little day to day stuff, the small fears that hold you back in seemingly small ways. Maybe that feeling doesn't even feel like fear. Probably it feels more like I-don't-want-to-be-uncomfortable.

Say you are sitting in front of the fire with your laptop, watching the snow fall outside. You're actually feeling virtuous, because you're working. It strikes you that it would be beautiful to walk in the woods with the dog.

But then, it's cold, and the zipper on your warmest coat is broken. That might be uncomfortable. Also sometimes it feels awkward to walk across the neighbor's yard to get to the park, it feels intrusive, and that feels uncomfortable. Your feet might get wet, too. All kinds of possible discomforts. Probably better to stay home.

All this happens in your mind in the space of about 3 seconds, and the absurdity of it would probably go unnoticed, if you weren't working with the idea of fearlessness. So you ask yourself "What would a fearless woman do?"

In a few moments, you are tramping across the neighbor's yard with your coat flapping open. You wave cordially to the neighbor, and zip your cozy fur vest a little higher under your broken coat.

I know it's little. It's tiny, actually. Tiny, mundane fears, tiny, mundane steps towards fearlessness. But it's important. And it's useful. And it's how we learn.

And if I hadn't gone out yesterday, I would never have seen the tiny miracle in the photo above: a perfect, crystalline snowflake caught for a moment - just a moment - in the arms of a glowing red rosehip.